Things I Miss

  • Summer holidays with my family. Dad reading the tide times out of the newspaper, wearing his straw hat and navy board shorts. Mum packing food for the week into plastic boxes, and packing the picnic for the car. Chip sandwiches a few hours into the journey. A numb bum from sitting still too long. Arriving at the bach and racing to bags a bedroom. Doing the dishes with Dad.


  • Knowing what I would be doing in a year. Year 9 then year 10 then year 11. First year, second year, third year of university. Life arranged by school terms, holidays, summer. The security that life wouldn’t, and couldn’t, change all that much.


  • Birthday parties. The living room would be unusually tidy, Mum playing hide the mess and stashing the clutter in her bedroom. The balloons, the party food, waiting for guests to arrive. Pass the parcel with lollipops and jokes. Treasure hunts in the garden, limbo under a pool noodle.


  • Sleepovers with my friends. Eating tater tots and baked beans. Staying in our pyjamas all day, walking to the supermarket to buy Pepsi and kumara to make a curry for dinner. Watching terrible TV and walking the dogs. 50 straight hours in each other’s company.


  • The comfort of being cooked dinner. Coming home from gymnastics on a Wednesday and knowing it was already on the table. Hot mashed potatoes. Homemade pizza on Fridays, Dad spending too much time rolling the bases and perfecting the toppings. And breakfast, waffles on Sundays, gluten free with chocolate chips.


  • My dog. Seeing him watching from the window as we drove the car into the garage. Hearing his squeals of delight as we walked up the stairs and let him out of the kitchen. Sharing almonds, apples and afternoons in front of the TV.


  • Anticipating London. Daydreaming and saving money for someday. Having something big to look forward to.¬†Planning for the future I’m now living.